Day 21 - Finished Editing, Thinking about the Audio Book

I’m a copy editor and my husband worked on his school paper. What could go wrong? We started the final edit last night and we’re done. Is it done? I’ll probably do one final read-thru. Will it be perfect? Nope. If you look hard enough, even major publishing houses miss typos from time to time. What we want here is “pretty damn good” and I think it is. I hope I’ll be forgiven for one or two misplaced commas. 

Should I celebrate? Nope. No time. Plenty more work to do. 

Now it’s time to format the manuscript for both the paperback and the eBook. This process should be easy. I’m not anticipating any issues since I’ve watched plenty of videos, read the KDP tutorials and even messed around with their templates a bit. 

When I was a wedding photographer, one of the first things people asked was, “How long will it take to get the photos back?” If I had one thousand RAW photos and knew I was delivering five hundred, I could safely estimate four to six hours total. And then I doubled it. Nothing ever takes as long as you think it will. I could usually work six hours per day, which meant two days to complete. And then I doubled that. Four days. Let’s call it a week, just in case. Life gets in the way, things happen, expect the unexpected. A week is actually really good turn-around for wedding photos. When I was juggling multiple couples, I would double that week. “Two weeks,” I would reply. 

So, to format the book, I’m thinking I can get it done in four hours. Double it. That’s eight hours. I can’t work eight hours per day. I’m in school and have homework. During the week, I can do two hours per day (realistically). That’s four days total. I can’t double that estimate because I’m running out of time. If the formatting takes four days (two hours per day) I’m done by Thursday. Maybe? Let’s see. We’re talking both the eBook and the paperback. I don’t actually expect the formatting to take that long. 

And then it’s time to design the cover. Font choices, readability, color schemes, design, downloading photos, Photoshop. Good thing I know what I’m doing. I mentioned before, I have twenty-five years experience using Photoshop. I’ve done some print work, but mostly I’ve done web-work. Here’s where Melanie gets nervous and puts way too much emphasis on the cover because everyone will see it and the cover makes or breaks your book. 

OK, so I have my work cut out for me. I’m up for it. However, I’m also simultaneously managing social media, writing correspondence for the Readers Collective, putting together goodies for subscribers, and writing this blog. I mentioned school, right? I frequently have forty-five to a hundred pages of reading per week, plus math homework. How many hours are there in a day, again? Oh. Only twenty-four? Cool. I can do it. Me and my best friend, coffee. 

I spent today finishing up the final edit with my husband. Mom came over and hung out for a bit. Not like I can ignore my mom. I only see her once a week and she’s getting up there in years. When she left, I turned on the Hallmark Channel and became engrossed in Harvest Moon - which has me thinking I really need to change the season of LESSONS IN LOVE to Fall. Add to list. 

But then I started thinking about the audio book. Should I record it myself? A million years ago I ran a podcast. Check this out: it was in the olden times before podcasts were a thing. Yep. Everyone told me I was crazy. There were few resources, iTunes didn’t yet have a podcast category, and it was actually the wild frontier. In fact, I’m not sure YouTube was a thing yet. Wow. We used to have to self-host our podcasts on our own websites. Soundcloud was around, but they didn’t allow long form audio. I did all that for about a year and had a small, but loyal audience that boosted my ego by telling me I had a great voice. I did all the audio recording, sound engineering (what it was at the time) and editing. Was it professional-grade audio? Meh. It was OK. Great for the time when there wasn’t much to compare it to. 

I can rent a soundproof studio and record my own audio for less than hiring a narrator. I got a few quotes from narrators and we’re talking in the thousands of dollars here. If you know someone good and affordable, let me know. The best part is, the studio is within walking distance of my house. I live in a lively neighborhood where the local bar often hosts obnoxious drunks who like to go, “woooooo!” all day long. My place is also right next to the elevator shaft. VROOOOOOM. CLUNK. All day. Not to mention the neighbor’s barking dogs, police sirens, clacking high heels in the hall, and airplanes flying overhead. Finally, since I live in a loft, audio sounds like it’s being recorded in a very large tin can - no matter what I do. So studio it is. I can get twelve hours for $250. If I can’t record a novella in twelve hours, I’m in trouble. I should buy some of that lubricating throat spray voice actors use. 

Instead of formatting the paperback, like I should have, I spent the afternoon looking up what it takes to be a good audio book narrator. I watched some videos, found some vocal exercises, and learned a few tips. Not to brag, but I’m pretty good at impressions. I think I can learn how to impersonate an audio narrator. Do I see a lucrative side-hustle in my future? Heh. Maybe. The hardest part of audio narration will be fatigue. When your mouth stops working and your tongue starts to twerk. I’m also a bonafide tongue thruster. It’s a thing. Look it up. I could record a few hours per day. Of course, this is all AFTER the paperback and eBook are rolling. 

Are audio books necessary? If you believe every self-publishing guru, they are. But are they really? The concept is: wide distribution. You want to get your book in front of as many people as possible. Audio books cover an entirely different audience: commuters, the disabled, and people who just like listening to books. I listen to audio books all the time. It makes sense to have that as an option. I do really like recording audio, but my concern is the cost. If I spend $250 on studio time (forget manual labor time) will I even make that back? What are the odds Lesson in Love will sell enough copies to cover my expenses? It’s slim. That said, once it’s up and online, it’s there for the foreseeable future. There’s also all the nonsense of ACX, Audible, and more marketing. Different marketing. It’s something to think about - and soon. The quicker I can get the audio book done, the better. 

Things are a bit tight right now, but overall, I’m feeling great that the finish line is on the horizon. I can actually see it.